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The Troll’s Male Sack: Penis Size

A young lad by the name of Theodore writes in and asks, “Troll, your clips are fantastic, but I see all of these big dicks going into the girls and mine is not like that. Am I a fag?”

Well, Theo, according to the “Kinsey Report,” the average penis is 6.16 inches and the average penis girth is 4.84 inches. Believe it or not, there is a correct way to measure your penis. Follow the 5 simple steps below to get a proper mesaurement…
1. Make sure you are as erect as possible.
2. Using a ruler or measuring tape, press one end against the base of the TOP side of your penis.
3. Read the measurement where the TIP of your penis touches the ruler.
4. If you’re using a cloth tape, hold it as straight as possible. A cloth tape on an exceptionally curved penis could mess up your results.
5. To measure the girth, wrap a strip of paper or string around the base of the shaft and measure the length once you uncurl it.

As for if you’re a homosexual or not, all you need do is watch this clip of the day. If you do not swell, then, yes, I am afraid you are indeed a homo. Happy measuring, Theo!