Coming this fall and winter to DVD and Blu-ray players everywhere will be Hustler Video’s next generation of 3D parodies: This Ain’t Conan the Barbarian XXX 3D, This Ain’t X-Men XXX 3D, This Ain’t Terminator XXX 3D and This Ain’t Flashdance XXX 3D.

“I’m really excited about doing a parody of Conan,” said Hustler Video’s Creative Director Drew Rosenfeld. “The movie as a whole is already so sensual, it’ll be great to actually make a porn spoof and show the sex scenes that they can’t show you in mainstream movies. We’ve been so focused on special FX for This Ain’t Avatar XXX 3D, This Ain’t Ghostbusters XXX 3D, and This Ain’t Harry Potter XXX 3D we wanted to add another element—Action!

This movie in 3D is going to rock. As for the X-Men parody, we’ll be doing a sexed up lampoon of Chris Claremont’s classic era Uncanny X-Men. It has so much potential to be the perfect porn parody. And then there’s Flashdance…let’s face it. It made Dirty Dancing look tame. This film has been begging to be parodied into a porn since the mid 80’s!”

This Ain’t Conan the Barbarian XXX 3D, This Ain’t X-Men XXX 3D, This Ain’t Terminator XXX 3D and This Ain’t Flashdance XXX 3D will be coming this fall and winter to DVD and Blu-ray!

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Despite Sheen’s distaste for my kind, I am happy to report that the Winner is in talks with Vivid Entertainment, who appear to want the headline-making actor to work on one of their new parodies.

According to Marquee Blog, Vivid’s founder and co-chairman, Steven Hirsch, sent the troubled actor a letter on March 3 asking him to direct a soon-to-be-made parody of Sheen’s sitcom, “Two and a Half Women.”

“We think it would be great if you would come in and direct the movie,” Hirsch wrote. “You pick the scenarios, positions, etc. The fact that you are the ultimate connoisseur of adult films would definitely work to your advantage. Based on all the publicity you have been getting, I am sure the sales will be outrageous.”

Sheen’s resident “Goddesses” shouldn’t feel left out either. Bree Olson and model Natalie Kenly are also invited to participate. No word yet on Sheen’s response to the odder. Stay tuned…

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From Hollywood Skin Co – In the golden age of porn parodies where anything can and will be turned into a XXX version, it’s hard to be surprised at a new one. But this week, Pink Lotus Entertainment is releasing their latest and greatest, and one you probably never thought you’d see: “Naporneon Dynamite.”

On October 7th, the world will see a new side the lovable geek “Naporneon,” who gets over his awkward phase and loses his virginity to Trisha, among other tantalizing acts. In “Naporneon Dynamite” everyone gets laid – Uncle Suave and Laquesha make no secret about what they like to do each other, and Debbie gives Paco her vote for class president…and then some.

According to Pink Lotus, the original movie appealed to a wide demographic because it stayed away from profanity, alcohol, and nudity – products of the movie’s Mormon creators. “Naporneon Dynamite” takes the opposite approach, giving the movie’s fans a chance to see all the sex and gratuitous nudity that was left out the first time around.

“All the talent really liked the original movie, and studied their respective characters to make this porno seem more like a sequel than a parody,” said Pink Lotus Ent. partner Vincenzo Piano.

“We want to send ‘Naporneon Dynamite’ to the original filmmakers, but we think their religion will prevent them from watching it. It’s too bad, because Debbie gets a great DP!”

Pink Lotus Entertainment is renowned for their early segue into the parody genre, producing original re-makes such as “Cuntourage” and “Horat,” which earned a 2009 AVN nomination for Best Sex Comedy and Best Actor.

“Naporneon Dynamite” stars Danny Wylde as an almost too believable Naporneon, and Aurora Snow as Debbie.

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New Sensations releases the arousing cover art for “The Breakfast Club: A XXX Parody” today. The Lee Roy Myers directed movie is scheduled to release July 5, but in the meantime, fans are treated to a provocative depiction of the 80’s classic movie cover. “The Breakfast Club: A XXX Parody” stars Samantha Ryan, Faye Reagan and Andy San Dimas in a movie about five unlikely students coming together in an afternoon of detention and sex education. Upon viewing the cover for “The Breakfast Club: A XXX Parody”, Colin, Director of Studio Relations at etailer AdultDVDEmpire.com exclaims, “It looks like the original version we sell on our mainstream site DVDEmpire.com. That item continues to sell well 25 years after the release. It’s a cult classic, so that’s a huge potential fan base.”

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