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The Troll’s Male Sack: Pick Up Lines

Time for another dip into the Mail Bag. Let’s see what we have here…ah yes, here we go. Little Joey writes in from Boston and says:

“Hi Sexual Troll. You are cool and teach me many things. But all your videos show the man with the lady doing the things after she likes him and after he is already a cool guy. What about if you are like me and not so cool? If there is any way you can give me some pick up lines that I could use I would be so happy because then I can be like the men in your videos. Thanks, your pal, Joey.”

Well, Joey. You’re forgetting I am just a mere Troll and do not have much interaction with the human ladies myself. I just observe from far away while pleasuring myself! However, I have just the clip to help you with your dilemma. And from right out of the Cheers bar in your very own city! Check out some fantastic lines from TV’s Ted Danson!

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Who Is The Troll?

As I am new to the mystical realm of the internet, many out there are wondering just who I am.  I, for lack of better explanation, am the SEXUAL TROLL!  By physical appearance I look much the same as my fellow troll cohorts.  I come from a secret land filled with many gnomes and trolls.  But I was a wee bit different.  You see, when they would all be playing their troll and gnomey games, I liked to sneak off alone.  To the outskirts of my magic land.  And I’d enjoy a good hiding behind a tree or well placed rock.  And then…look for human ladies.  Naked human ladies.  And watch them.  Watch them through the treeholes.  And play with myself all day long.

That was my life day in and day out for the last thirteen years.  Until now.  You see, a young lad hiking through the forest seems to have left his MacBook behind.  And let me tell you – his loss is my (and your) gain!!  For now I am able to sign on to this magical internet and share with you all the visual treaties that get me off!

Alas, the lad returned – and at first we battled mighty over who would keep the magical white polycarbonite portal into all me fantasies.  Then, we both relaxed and enjoyed a few clips of teenies flashing their bits – and an alliance was formed!  Right there in the woods!  “The Sexual Troll” and “The Scumbag” formed a perverted truce right there in that very spot that shall forever be documented on this here website that you be readin’!

So sit back, horny humans, and let’s troll!

Let us begin with one of my favorite scenarios…the high school school bus.  Ahh many days there were I would hide behind the rock in front of the nearest school and watch these type of goings ons.  Heeheheheeeehheee!  I don’t even need to see these girls get naked before I squirt my troll juice all over the rock!!

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Hello!

I am always watching...I am THE TROLL.  The Sexual Troll.  And I am here to do what I love best – drop me seed!  All over me belly! Heheheheeee!

Care to join me?

Well, Good!

Let’s Troll